Holmes and Watson. Partners in crime-solving? or Steampunk homos?

Guy Ritchie's SHERLOCK HOLMES opens up this X-mas. Homoerotic themes are nothing new to Ritchie (based on the only other two movies of his that I've seen). And RDJr. seems to be reveling in the point that he and Jude's characters will come off gay for eachother in the film.


I have a special place in my pants for both these actors. I saw Jude Law strolling down a narrow street in Venice, Italy one summer in 2004. He was a stunning sun-god in person. And I saw Robert Downey Jr. interviewed by that Roeper douche for the Singing Detective at a Chicago film festival in 2003. RDJr. was so classy in his responses to questions about his bisexuality and struggle with drug addiction. How do you pull that off? By being dry and witty.


Will it be a mishandled action/adventure popcorn movie? Maybe. Will it be bloody sexy as hell? Counting on it.

Prohibition Era Party

Rene Nevarez manages Sunset Carpets, a locally-owned and operated carpet company that installs upholstery for Herman Miller showrooms and such. His personal living space is pretty sweet. It's a converted fire station. Perfect for acting out those fire fighter fantasies. Unfortunately, the city took out the pole when he closed the deal. But he intends to reinstall one.

This past weekend, Rene threw a mellow, classy speak-easy theme cocktail party. Guests had to call in advance for a personal pass word. When you arrived at the residence, an unassuming Rene greeted you as if you had the wrong address. Once you discretely dropped the correct phrase he led you through a dark, cluttered office space that still has the large, folding garage doors wide enough for a EPFD haz-mat truck. He led you to a candle-lit flight of stairs that took you to a dimly-lit basement full of cafe tables and chairs with throaty recordings of Edith Piaf blaring softly for ambiance.

The speakeasy was quite indeed the cat's pajamas, bee's knees, all that jazz, and...uh, whatever else.

SteamPunk Cocktail Party

A few weeks ago, mi hermanita turned 21. In honor of the upcoming Victorian/Wild West issue of *COOL-O* magazine, we decided to host her birthday cocktail party and helped her celebrate turning 21 in the 21st century with a steam punk vibe.


Tonight we're gonna party like it's 1899!



Time to get steam-crunk!


steamy steam-boyz...

So El Paso, next time you're coolin' with your crew and feeling kinda funky
you guys should roll out, dressed all steampunky.

SOHO: SO good or NO good?

SO good! Located a block from Pride Square, Soho Cocktail Lounge is a nice breather from the steamy, seamy air of gay dives. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy steamy and seamy. It just gets stifling sometimes. Soho itself is like the clientele it attracts- predominately straight, yuppy-hipster with a "dress funky, not junky" dress code. It aims to be edgy and as everyone knows, homophobia is so not hip. I consider it gay-friendly but it definitely doesn't market or cater to gays specifically with special nights like it does to the rock crowd, Latin crowd, and even goth kids.

That's fine by me cuz that just means that gay cats into indie rock, Latin music, and goth culture have a place to go. And that's what I like to see: a diversity of interests and subcultures within the gay community. When we're all into Lady Gaga-blazing, pink-lemonade vodka-pouring, rainbow-banner-bearing bars with come-as-you-are dress codes, then we just become fucking boring. Or worse, a cliche. (I actually love Lady Gaga, pink-lemonade vodka, and coming as-I-am. But I still stand behind my point.)

But I digress, Tuesdays are my preferred nights to go to catch free indie rock shows. But Wednesdays are fun too. Soho has an open deck night where local DJs spin old school house, drum and bass, ambient, and sometimes hip hop. Being named Soho, I like to keep an NY theme to my drink orders when I'm there and stick to cosmos and manhattans. But these are actually hit or miss depending on who's tending bar that night. The plumegranite martini is one of their signature drinks. I recommend it if you want to order for a lady or if you're a girly-drink drunk.

The owners and staff are always welcoming and friendly and the space is conducive to intimate mixing and mingling.

House of Dozal

When the cat's away, the mice will play. The mice being awesomely cute hipster friends of Rob Dozal. With his parents' house all to himself, he gathered DJs from Late Night Social Club together to spin in his dad's painting studio.


With the crisp November night air snapping outdoors, the close gathering of warm bodies, warm beats, in a warm converted garage was pleasantly chill. I stuck to Apples and Derek the whole evening. Apples writes and photographs for EP Culture Beat, a sweet blog where writers, photogs, and artists cover cool mainstream and underground events in El Paso. Derek is a sweet, chill guy who's always a pleasure to talk to. He has great stories that would make a great web comic. They're the kind of couple that makes you want to get together with them to get drunk and write. I love those kind of couples.

Apples, Rob, and Derek.

Brew Ha-ha at Ruli's International Kitchen

As a pre-Thanksgiving dinner celebration, our crew got together at Ruli's International Kitchen. 10 bucks got you 4 premium beers and Cigarettes After Sex. Dinner was before the sex and cost extra. J/k, y'all. Cigarettes After Sex, the band.

Frontman Greg Gonzalez warms up.

Known for it's "seasonal menu of international foods", Ruli's offers entrees that skimp on serving size but load up on flavor, along with a cosmopolitan beer list. There's potential for RIK as a music venue if they would at least turn down the lights during the performance.

The evening was casually classy. Well, not so much towards the end. I chugged all my brews, plus three of my friend's beers. Next thing I knew, my entire upper body was sticking out of an ex-boyfriend's car window as I puked my guts out on the drive home.

Our English muffin, Lauren, with her friend Raul, owner of Ruli's.

*COOL-O* magazine Steampunk edition

Steampunk is the nostalgia for a time that never was. It's picturing a world where Victorian culture is the aesthetic context of present and future space-age technology. Picture us in waistcoats, cravats, spats, vests, and bowlers. Women with corsets, underbusts, parasols, and tabby boots. We would present call cards and tip our hats but also carry copper-plated MP3 players and bronze-encased telecommunicators. There would be no viable electrical grid so gas/oil lamps and candles cast a soft, balmy glow on our world at night. We ride horses and buggies and take commercial steam air ships for long trips. And our law enforcement officers, military and criminals possess ray gun technology.

As 2010 starts to rolls near, I'd like to reset El Paso's timeline to 1910 and redraw its history. One in which the Republic of Texas is a protectionist, independant country. Flanked on one side by an expansionist United States and on the other by a powerful Mexico that is fueling its means of production with the gold struck in its state of California.

What would a strategically situated border city like El Paso look like culturally and socio-politically in this fantastical, speculative cold war situation? Let's find out shall we? Unfortunately, no alternate history books describing these events have survived. Nah. Just a random little Tijuana Bible fag rag published off a steam printing press is all that's left to offer us a glimpse into the way life wasn't back then.